vaguelyjewish:

testoster0ne:

how do woman not orgasm when inserting tampons

like isn’t just like having sex idgi?

this sounds like a mitt romney diary entry

1nd2rd3st:

ridge:

do you ever pretend like you didn’t see something so the other person doesn’t feel embarrassed 

750,324 people whose mama taught them right

heart-filled-with-hope:

If you’re battling a mental illness and didn’t want to wake up this morning but did anyways, you’re a motherfucking badass. Because living with a mental illness is hard and I’m damn proud of you for still being here and fighting. You’re metal as hell and tough as nails. So keep on fighting, you kickass Viking warrior. You can win this.

wannajoke:

This is Genius
430

fruitcrocs:

when u don’t know how to reply to a text from your crush

image

subject13fringe:

montypythonandtheholyblog:

today I learned that if you want to slash someone’s tires, don’t slash all four; only slash three because if you slash all four their insurance will pay for it but if you only slash three they have to pay for it all out of pocket 

image

"Nothing in the world smells as good as the person you love."
Unknown (a knot in my throat now)
slappinbitches:

thefrogman:

[video]

Is this the Chuck Norris of toddlers?